If you would like to share your thoughts with others who read these pages, we encourage you to do so. If you would prefer to email the Epifani family directly, please feel free to use the following email account: friendsofmarina@gmail.com
For those of you who are new to this, this is a "blog" which is short for "web log," and you can use the blog to read the comments of others as well as write and post your own. The blog is administered by Mark Ruch (at least temporarily), Deborah Ferber and Paolo Epifani, but will likely be read by and shared with hundreds of other friends and relatives of Marina.
To "post" your comments, simply click on the text that says "COMMENTS." We are allowing "anonymous" postings (meaning you won't have to be registered and logged in) - so as to keep things simple and expedient, but please list your name at the top of your message so the readers know who you are.
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9 comments:
From Mark Ruch:
On behalf of the Epifani family, I'd like to thank those who emailed me with their condolences and kind thoughts. I passed along all emails to Giulia, Deborah, her husband Sean and Paolo, and they are very grateful to all of you. For those of you who don't know me, I was Marina's boyfriend from 1999 to 2004, and I can assure you that she would have been equally grateful.
I received the bad news last Tuesday and wrote several old friends. As it turns out, my original email was forwarded to others, and on and on and on... I soon began receiving replies from all over the world.
We are trying, but it's been very difficult to coordinate a proper notification of friends and family, and so I'm hoping this blog will help people either pass along, find and/or contribute to a shared notice and living memorial to Marina.
My heart goes out to everyone touched by this tragedy. I hope Marina has found the peace and happiness she so desperately sought.
-Mark Ruch, April 2007
P.S. if you'd prefer to send a private note to the family, feel free to email: friendsofmarina@gmail.com
Deborah and Paolo have access to that email account as well as I do. My thought is that they will take over administration of this blog when things return to something resembling normal.
From Charmagne Peters:
Mark, thank you for giving all of those who knew Marina the opportunity to express our adoration for her.
I grew up with Deborah Epifani and never knew Marina until I worked with her at Intraware. The minute I saw the Epifani last name appear on an email, I just knew it had to be Debbie's sister. Marina and I were friends from the moment we spoke.
She was lovely... I will always remember her wit, her laughter and her smile. Although we had lost contact in the last year or so, she was so very much loved and we will all miss her very much.
My sympathy goes out to her family. We hope that if there is anything they need, anything at all... that you'll please let us know. I can't begin to imagine the difficulty they are experiencing at this moment.
I found out on Wednesday the 4th and was numb. This is a complete shock. I hope that she has found the peace she was searching for.
Again, thank you to Mark, Debbie and Paolo for allowing us a few minutes to share our memories of Marina. - Char
Marina, you will always have a special place in my heart. I thank you for your grace, the joy you shared with me. My memories of you will be always the blue sky, the sunny afternoons in Berkeley, in San Francisco, in Walnut Creek, in the memories of Brazil: Thank you for your lightness of being!
When we met in Berkeley, I was starting my research on Drummond's poetry. I found this poem by him and I translated it for you:
A UM AUSENTE (TO ONE WHO IS ABSENT)
By Carlos Drummond de Andrade
From: Farewell, 1996
I have the right to miss,
the right to accuse you.
There was an implicit pact that you broke
and without saying good-bye you left.
You destroyed the pact.
You destroyed the general life, the common
[agreement
of living and exploring the ways of obscurity
without a time limit without consultation without
[provocation
to the point of the fallen leaves at the moment
[when they fall.
You anticipated the hour.
Your clock hand went crazy, making crazy our
[hours.
What thing could you have done that was graver
than the act without continuation, the act
[in itself,
the act that we neither dare nor know how to
[dare
because after it there is nothing else?
I have the right to miss you,
our life together spent in friendly conversation,
simply shaking hands, not even that, voice
shaping syllables both known and banal
that always used to express certainty and security.
Yes, I miss you.
Yes, I accuse you because you did
the unpredictable in the laws of friendship and
[nature
you didn’t leave us even the right to ask
why you did it, why you left.
Continue leve, Marina! Be in peace!
Vivaldo
Marina dearest
Today, April 3, 2008, we gathered here (relatives and friends)
Naples in the Capuchin Church of the Corsican V. Emanuele to pray
For your soul, on the occasion of the first anniversary of your
Death.
This event that has left all of us in shock and
Loss deeper, making it harder to accept
Your immature disappearance.
Today we want to tell you that we remember with great affection, today
We also want to tell you that our tranquillizzarti huge
Sorry for your loss is partly mitigated by the thought that where
Hours you feel you are the smells of eternal life and that you
Trasmettino entire peace that your noble soul and your innate
Sensitivity would have earned on this land.
We embrace you tenderly with infinite affection and love
Dicendoti who are still alive in our hearts.
PS: words written and read during the religious function from his
Elio Catenacci.
--------------------
Italian version
--------------------
Marina carissima
Oggi, 3 aprile 2008, ci siamo qui riuniti (parenti e amici) a Napoli nella Chiesa dei Cappuccini al corso V. Emanuele per pregare per la tua anima, in occasione del primo anniversario della tua morte.
Evento questo che ha lasciato ciascuno di noi nello sgomento e nello smarrimento più profondi, rendendoci così più difficile accettare la tua immatura scomparsa.
Oggi vogliamo dirti che ti ricordiamo con affetto enorme, oggi vogliamo anche dirti per tranquillizzarti che il nostro enorme dolore per la tua perdita è in parte mitigato dal pensiero che dove tu ti trovi ora senti i profumi della vita eterna e che questi ti trasmettino tutta la pace che il tuo nobile animo e la tua innata sensibilità avrebbero meritato anche su questa terra.
Ci abbracciamo teneramente a te con infinito affetto ed amore dicendoti che sei sempre viva nei nostri cuori.
PS: parole scritte e lette durante la funzione religiosa dall'amico Elio Catenacci.
I miss Marina every day that she's been gone. I'm so mad, just so mad that she is gone.
From Mark Ruch:
Dear Marina,
I was traveling and alone on the anniversary of your departure. It seemed apt somehow to reflect on your death while in a state of solitude - as you often were.
You are missed and agonized over, and loved - mostly you are loved, now by those who loved you then.
I speak for many in saying we are saddened and angered that we couldn't somehow be there to help and support you in your time of crisis. The regret is often eclipsed however, overridden by a sense of gratitude in having known and benefited from the brilliance and passion you possessed and shared with us.
I remember you when I'm conducting business calls, and wishing I could muster the adroit, thoughtful and thorough skills you wielded in that world. I remember you when I'm caring for pets, and wishing I could access that database of veterinary knowledge you carried around. I remember you when I cook pasta sauce and burn the garlic and think "oh boy, I better start over."
I wish you could have another chance, and start over.
It's a tragedy that you are gone, but I am grateful for the memories and lessons. I am hopeful that you are happy now, and at peace.
With love always,
Mark
I have come to know about Marinaś death in January 2015. Iám from Santiago, Chile and met Marina when she moved to the USA from South Africa. We lived on the same street in Lafayette and she and I were best of friends. After 5 years, I returned to my country and we kept in touch for some time, last time she wrote was probably about 10 years ago and sent me pictures of her and her boyfriend that I suspect is Mark.We came to the USA with my husband and children and went to Lafayette to show them where I used to live and we went to Marinas house where I found her mother Guilia. I was shocked with the news she gave me of her death. She was a wonderful friend, charming, funny. I gave only beautiful memories of her. I pray to God everyday since then so that she may be in peace and in his arms. May the Lord give her the joy and peace she didńt find on earth.
My love to all her family specially Giulia.
Mariana Fernandez
Colleen Ryder (now Rose) said ...
I was saddened to find this blog today. Marina was my very best childhood friend when she lived in South Africa. We were neighbours and we met through the fence in Lombardy East. She was a part of every day of my young years - shared secrets, cried over boyfriends, learned life lessons together. When she left South Africa I wept. I had to be sent home from school on that day - I could not imagine my life without her. She was so beautiful, smart, and above all brave. I have been searching for her on Facebook and other social platforms and only today did I realise why I havent been able to find her. Marina you made such a big impression on me and my life. I am so grateful for your friendship. My life would have been much poorer without you
Lots of love
Colleen
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